Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
