How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
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