youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
I FOUND THE LEGS
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
