I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
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