i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
