Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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