real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
Randomize
