I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
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