love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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