You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
