She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Randomize
