if i can run in heels then i can drive
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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