After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Randomize
