Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
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