Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
