Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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