Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Randomize
