YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Randomize
