a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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