Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Randomize
