Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
