the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
