I smell stomach acid.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
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