actually, I'm a sock model
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
