I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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