Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize
