Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
