Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
