Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
