Whats the glycemic index on semen?
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize