"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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