Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Randomize
