I bet he comes in French.
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
he just fucked me for my cheese..
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
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