I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
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