found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
