I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Randomize
