GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize
