I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize
