Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize