are you so shy because you have an std?
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
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