singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize
