standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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