and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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