Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
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