Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize