please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
Randomize
