My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize
