i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Randomize
