I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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