It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
